Houston
"At the Beach, at the Beach, out at Pontchartrain Beach,
You'll have fun, you'll have fun every day of the week!
You'll love the thrilling rides - laugh till you split your sides,
At Pontchartrain Beach!" - RADIO JINGLE
In summers long-past, I remember my Uncle Gene picking me up, along with my grandparents. We'd drive along Elysian Fields and look at the nice, new, modern houses with the glass globes and birdbaths in the front yards. There was no doubt - I knew where we were going: we were going to Pontchartrain Beach!
My first memories of that place were when I was just three or four years old - 1954 or 1955.
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| ABOVE: THE 7up SIGN AND MAIN PART OF THE ROLLER-COASTER CALLED THE BIG ZEPHYR. SINCE HURRICANE BETSY DESTROYED THE TOP NEON PINNACLE IN 1965 AND A NEW ONE WAS BUILT LATER, THIS PHOTO MUST HAVE BEEN TAKEN SOME TIME IN EARLY 1966 |
Once inside the gate, the very first sight that met my view was the entrance to the Big Zephyr itself. When I was real small I couldn't go on the "Big Zephyr" roller-coaster. (But Kiddieland had a "Little Zephyr" and I enjoyed riding on it for years.) Next to it was a little ride for children - a crank-powered car that ran on rails. I tried to make it go as fast as I could, and even wondered if it could (or would) tip over as we reached a sharp curve. That ride was my favorite one there - when I was five.
After that, we would go to KIDDIELAND! Here was a magical place - it seemed so BIG back then, but it really wasn't. There were the boats that went round and round in a tiny cement pond. The kids would sit in front or in back - and I preferred the front so I could ring the bell!! That was one of the sights, sounds, and memories of that long-ago time. The constant ding-ding of the little boat bells meant kids like me were having a good time.
Looking up from the boats, there was an old lighthouse, with a yellow light flashing on the top. There were other rides there, including the carousel, which I liked to call the "flying horses." It was right next to the bumper cars, and I loved to watch the people run into each other. Every so often there was this whip cracking noise that would come from that vicinity. I never found out what it was. Also, when the cars started, a set of musical horns tooted a quick "Meet me in St. Louie, Louis" tune.
THE GAY MIDWAY!!
There was a main drag called the Gay Midway. (Gay back then meant happy.) It was one mile long, and boasted dozens of rides and other attractions from one end to the other.
On the Midway was the "Penny Arcade", and it was always thronged with people eager to put their coins in slots to play the machines - in the day before video games. I saw no sense in paying to get in to an amusement park just to play pinball! Along the Midway were lots of traditional carnival or county fair attractions such as the milk bottle throw - I never saw anybody win by knocking down those lead milk bottles! I really think they were glued there! One popular place was a pellet-gun duck shoot, and my favorite was the fish stream. This was the only place where kids were guaranteed to catch a fish! Actually, they weren't really fish - they were made of wood with a metal staple at the mouth and a number on the side. The player was given a fishing pole and almost as soon as the hook hit the water there was a wooden fish on the line! The man there would take the wet fish and look up the number. I don't recall ever winning anything there, but I'm sure somebody got a prize every so often.
There was the Port O'Call restaurant. Actually it was a hamburger stand, and I never went there until much later on in life - and felt bad that I hadn't gone sooner. The food was very good. The place had a nautical theme, with portholes, fishnets and life rings, in keeping with the overall beach/water theme.
My all-time favorite ride there was the Ferris Wheel. It wasn't anything special, as Ferris Wheels go, but it afforded the rider a chance to get cool, as well as to see the whole beach from way up high. That wasn't the best part: the city was behind in the distance, and could be seen on clear days or nights. Straight ahead was the lake - Lake Pontchartrain. On hot summer nights, Nature outdid Man in putting on an electrical show, as raging thunderstorms sparked white and orange in the distance.
Most of the time on the ride involved getting all of the people on and off. I always hoped they'd forget about me and let me go around once again. Up above, a couple of kids would rock the seat, and soon enough, others would follow suit. I remember hoping that whoever I was riding with would not get the urge to rock the seat as well! I used to admire the latticework and the construction of the wheel itself.
Then it would start to move, and the cool breeze would really kick in. My stomach would flutter as we'd descend, and as we passed the motor, it made a funny grinding sound that sounded to me like "Chlorox! Chlorox!" so I called it the "Chlorox machine."
FUN HOUSE!
There was a fun house which changed through the years, at the earliest having a big clown face in the front. A song, "New Orleans is My Home Town" was to mention it: "Meet at the Beach in front the Clown!" When the clown head was removed, there was a tiny clown head put there so anyone meeting somebody could remember where the old one "usta" be.
The Space Walk: Later the huge clown head disappeared, and the old Fun House became some sort of interplanetary walk-through fun house, complete with a hall of mirrors and out-of-this-world caves, way-out music and sound effects, and space ship interiors, ending in a Saturn Slide."
In its last incarnation, it became a haunted house and that was a very good quality ride.
MORE RIDES:
There was a twirley ride called the Scrambler at the end, and later another more modern roller coaster, called the Rajin' Cajun was built. There one could take an aerial lift car to the other end of the Midway.
At the other end where the Skyway ended, some great attractions were to be found! Some rides that came and went there include the Rotor, which was a rotating cylinder that went so fast the riders were pressed up against the side walls. Then the BOTTOM dropped! It was an awesome ride!
At the same opposite end of the Midway was the SailPlanes. There were these small cabins suspended from a center pillar. Each "plane" had a rudder for steering, and one could perform aerobatics by moving the rudder when the central column began to twirling the planes got airborne. I have a favorite memory of going on this ride with my grandfather. We had a lot of fun. My mind plays that memory like it lasted a long time, but in reality the ride only lasted for a few minutes.
Toward the middle was an ancient ride called the BUG. It was supposed to be some sort of caterpillar and went up and down on a track, while going in a circle. It was a simple ride, but as has been said: "Everybody loves the BUG."
Near where the BUG was, there was a controversial ride, the Wild Maus, an import from Germany. It consisted of individual cars negotiating a roller-coaster-type track layout. It was famous for the very tight hairpin turns that the cars made way high up on the upper level. One day, shortly after the ride opened, my Aunt Marie and Uncle Johnny went to Pontchartrain Beach, and rode the Wild Maus. My Aunt suffered a bruised rib. On that day, also, one of the cars had an accident involving serious injury
On the Beach itself, there was a stage, where every day high-wire, trapeze, and many other acts took place. Local and nationally known celebrities such as Michael Landon and even Elvis appeared on this stage. There were also dancing fountains, changing color and intensity with the music.
These were fun times - and this was a fun place. In "the City That Care Forgot," this was truly a park to forget one's cares and to just have a good time. The Beach was proof positive that one indeed could have a ball without alcohol!!
THE END OF AN ERA
Then came the announcement that nobody could believe: it seems as though, despite the many undeveloped areas and run-down sections of town, a major condo development was slated for this very area! The Beach would have to be torn down!
There were numerous reasons given for why the Beach closed: the condo project, integration, insurance costs, dwindling attendance, etc. For whatever reason or combination of reasons, the Beach would go - and there was nothing anyone could do about it.
One day I had a limo job that took my clients to the Bali Ha'i Restaurant. I was surprised that that venerable Lakefront institution had survived the Beach Closure. While waiting outside, I saw the rides and places of amusement I grew up with as a kid. Today there were no lights. Today there was no noise of kids screaming on the roller coaster. There were just boards and debris - and what remained to be torn down.
I walked through Kiddieland for the very last time. I saw what was left of the little rides that to me were so very big and exciting when I was a little boy. It is always so big and bright and exciting when you're five. I looked up to see the old lighthouse: it was still there. I noticed a National Historic Places plaque on the side of it, and hoped that little bronze square would be enough to protect it from the bulldozer.
I walked down the "Gay Midway" but it wasn't so gay today. All was in shambles. As I threaded my way through the destruction, I remember finding myself unconsciously whistling "Send in the Clowns." In the circus, clowns were sent in as a distraction when an act had gone wrong and performers were in trouble. From where I stood, looking at the sad scene before me, they really needed to send in the clowns. Here and there stood few steel drums in which some boards were being burned, and it was like watching all those good times go up in smoke. Smoke can get in your eyes...
A year later, with the exception of the lighthouse, the whole Pontchartrain Beach Amusement Park was gone - gone to join the swelling ranks of things that we look back upon. The feelings, tastes, sounds, sights, and smells of that place would live on, but only in the memories of those of us who were lucky enough to have had this magical land as a part of our lives when we were young.
As I turned to leave, I took a look back, and thought: "Thanks for the Memories!"
EPILOGUE:
That big condo and resort project that provided the excuse to do away with the Beach was never built. The land was left void of structures - except for the old Kiddieland Lighthouse, which actually was there well before the land for Pontchartrain Beach was reclaimed. It is ironic that the first thing built on the site was also the last thing to remain. The only other landmark structure visible in the area is the smokestack. It has now been incorporated into the University Of New Orleans' University Center.
In the United States, many - if not most of the traditional amusement parks have been torn down in the name of progress. Washington, D.C. no longer had Glen Echo, Houston has done away with AstroWorld, and Pittlburgh's fabulous Kennywood Park has turned itself into a theme park in order to survive.
So where do we take our kids? We have to travel large distances to overcrowded mega Theme Parks such as Disney or Seaworld. We pay exorbitant prices for one or two visits - in a lifetime.
Theme Parks are sterile, clean, efficient separator machines - quickly separating us from our MONEY! The chances of bumping into family or friends by accident at one of these places? Highly unlikely!
The old-style amusement parks were unsophisticated hometown affairs, geared for the locals. On any given visit to one of these, one could almost be assured of bumping into friends, neighbors, schoolmates, or family members. It was even a place to meet up with them and have a great time - and make wonderful memories - without it costing a fortune. It wasn't a mega-coaster or super ride that I recall; it was the atmosphere that is not present in any of the parks of today.
There are reasons for nostalgia: remembering what once was with fondness, and lamenting its passing. Then I guess I'm nostalgic. I wouldn't mind another chance to get stuck on the top of the ferris wheel - and watch the fireworks of a midsummernight's thunderstorm over the lake.
I wouldn't mind that at all!
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